I was sitting in the community room and
facing to the house of our dogs. My eyes struck with the leaves of the Indian
trees in front of me. I show all the branches have a leaves. The leaves as a whole have side to
side even in the last part of every branch. This is something in every human being. We are all pilgrim
people on our way toward wholeness of life. For three months living in the
community as a young sister many things happen, with the good and not so good experiences, made me realized that we are all in the same boat, no matter how
many years the person in the religious life is not a guarantee she is free from
conflict. The conflict is between ourselves that produce emotional or spiritual
discomfort. As the youngest in the community I cannot demand
a witness, each one of us capable to become witness, in fact I will be
frustrated in this reality in my present moment. I am a witness. I have to open
my eyes and encounter with their uniqueness as they encounter with my
uniqueness. Every person has back ground, as well as all grew up with the
different atmosphere family.
Sometimes I try to understand why people doing this
and that and for me something is not properly, and all of my answers was every
person has two influences; from outside their self and from inside. Outside
them are atmosphere in their family, cultures, how their parents and
environments treat them. And from inside are our genetic from our ancestors, our
way of responds, life style choices and even God within. Even the ways we express our love are
different, some with gentle and some with challenge. Actually my expectations
with the person or moment produce conflict within myself.
The conflict within journey together with the awareness and understanding. That is open to grow. Like the leaves of the Indian tree, is always
side to side with the branch in the middle, human being as I am growing
together in my positive and negative, love, egoism, goodness, influence from
inside and outside as God creation.
Living in wholeness is never achieved completely in my time, is always
in the way, the whole of my life. Everything is growing. I can only make effort
but everything will rely in God alone, he is the true healer.
bykristprast
